How to Guarantee Failure

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Fun article to objectively help you realize bad practices that will guarantee failure.

How do you duplicate failure?

When interviewing VP's and IT directors from the Fictitious Fortune 200 we asked them, "How does your organization duplicate failure"?

And they said...

  • We dont't read the docs.
  • We always believe everything the sales people tell us.
  • We ensure the tech team don't get to keep patches up-to-date.
  • We don't change our applilcation passwords EVER. It would irritate the vendor.
  • We don't include the tech team in vital decision making or long term planning.
  • We don't send our tech team to training on mission critical software. On going education takes $ away from bonuses.
  • We don't test SQL before running it on production.
  • We only use technologies we know and don't bother ourselves with any new innovations that can save time and money.
  • We don't use Linux or Open Source. We prefer being bound to vendor licensing schemes.
  • We ensure newly purchased products only use OS versions too old to be patched.
  • We ensure Disaster Recovery is the last item factored into new system and software purchases.